05/11/21 Four Seasons in Hell - Winter
Okay, let’s blow through these last four episodes and never speak of this again.
It’s Winter and Lorelai smells snow, I imagine because snow in purgatory smells a little like sulfur.
Okay, wait, everybody being old is weird. It’s like watching totally different people dressed up like the characters. It's the jump from show to show, I think.
A few zingers here and there - the whole town got Kirk a pig because there was a chance he might reproduce and he has a business called OOOOOOOOber and it appears nothing has changed in Stars Hollow.
Rory has a boyfriend, Paul and no one remembers his name. Heh. He is really forgettable. I’m probably going to forget about him too by the end of this episode. She’s also stress tapping.
The bit about everybody forgetting about Paul, though...okay, that’s pretty funny.
But we address Richard’s death. Yes, King Richard of Gilmore has passed. A moment of silence, please.
But yeah...we’re finally acknowledging that Michel is very obviously a gay man. (Woo) Lorelai hates the new chef because he’s not Sookie. Sookie, as we all know, is off making movies, so the inn doesn’t have a chef.
BTW, when Lorelai shows up to Emily’s house, the maid answers and speaks spanish...the captions say: Berta speaks in her language. Bruh. It’s Spanish. Then the handyman comes in and he apparently speaks in his language too. What the hell? And then they say it’s not Spanish…?
It sounds like Spanish. Like, I don’t speak Spanish fluently, but I speak enough to actually understand some of what she was saying without captions so...
Okay, but that painting of Richard, yo. I mean, he was one of my favorite characters too, but damn.
So, like, they have this huge fight at the wake and we find out that Lorelai couldn’t remember a good story about Richard...so she tells the worst possible stories she can think of.
To be fair, I’d be furious too.
(Heh, Digger or Scooter or whatever is still in love with Lorelai. Heh.)
Anyway, because of that fight, 257-year-old Lorelai is thinking about having a baby with Luke via a surrogate (because she thinks he missed out on having a baby with her even though he literally said he’s fine with their life as it is now.) Paris, as it happens, owns the surrogacy company...which was pretty on-brand.
Rory’s in London...with Logan. I mean WITH Logan. Wasn’t she with what’s his face a second ago? Oh, they have an ARRANGEMENT. Gah, this is dumb. Why didn’t they just get married if they were going to do this?
Anyway, side note: Paris has divorced from Doyle, Lane and Zach are still in a rock band and Hey, Sebastian Bach is still hanging in there. They actually sound better than they did before.
So, jumping back to Emily. Lorelai goes to visit and finds her surrounded by Berta’s family decluttering Emily’s house and they still don’t know what language anyone is speaking.
Maybe it’s Esperanto? I’m sorry, I’m a little obsessed with the fact that it clearly sounds like Spanish and no one seems to know that.
Lorelai convinces Emily to go to therapy to deal with her husband’s death which, I’m like, Y’all all need to go while you playing...and then, she gets duped into meeting her mom’s therapist. It’s about damned time.
At least Paul Anka is still alive. Dog’s gotta 20 years old by now.
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